Monster in the mirror

the monster in the mirror. by =Pretty-As-A-Picture on deviantART

Battle not with monsters, lest ye become a monster, and if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you

~Friedrich Nietzsche

When I came across this quotation before I didn't really understand it. However, recent unfolding of events made me think of this quote and understand it more than ever before.

I am now very very frustrated with someone. In my rebel against this person's conduct I think I have become a worse person. This person is truly uninspiring and I am sick of the attitude problem that seem to get worse everyday. Compound all this with the fact that this person is wayyy older than I am and I think that this person should have known better. As I view this person's life through my tainted vision, I don't see any bright future or even a glimmer of success because in my heart I think that this person would pass over all the opportunities to the wind and be left barren.

However, my rebel toward this person couldn't be done in face to face combat so I resorted to passive aggressiveness without realizing it. I started withdrawing my participation, delaying any response, procrastinate the execution of responsibilities tasked on me: basically developing a chronic attitude disorder of my own. I started slowly to become the things I hate. Angels can't win in the clash of monstrous creatures and so that was what I slowly turning into.

But like a jolt of electrocution I was stunned into realization this morning. It dawned on me that there is no use trying to change people when they are beyond that. It is not my responsibility to see this person through or support this person in their flimsy illusion. There is no use being rebellious of things that will not change. Change can only come from within and trying to force it would only make us be like the things we attempt to change.

What is in your power is yourself. If they do not want to be the person they should have been, there is no reason to follow in their path to nowhere. I have to fulfill what is required of me because what I become in the end is my own devising. Blame is lame.

So what I have to do now is make a major U-turn and reset my course. I'll do my part beautifully and those who won't can just get lost in their solitary universe. I vow to NEVER BE LIKE THAT PARTICULAR PERSON.