A puzzle piece out of place

Remember those essays that we have to write an autobiography for inanimate objects like "I am a pencil" , "Life of a boat", or "Being a television"? Now, think for a second if by a tragic turn of fate your destiny is to be the King of Fruits: Durian. Then, the story continues that someone brought you (a fairly good durian by anyone's count) to a foreign country where they don't have durian and are unaccustomed to the sheer intensity of the King of Fruits. You would surely be ridiculed, shamed, and insulted  far less than what you worth. You know they even included durian as one of the challenges for the Fear Factor show? Someone is awarded money just if they can stand you. Quite a different atmosphere to find yourself. Surely the battle for your self-esteem would be a war that you would lose. The incongruous reaction that you get from them is starkly different from back home, making you largely confused and astounded.
.
.
But, does this mean that you are what they say?
Is your worth determined by external factors that are as heterogeneous as each grain of sand if scrutinised under a microscope? (Please, call my bluff and check those grains of sand under a microscope. It will dawn on you that your gross perspective of things is sadly inadequate and unreliable).

I beg to differ. Someone's incapacity to recognise your worth should not be the reason that you second guess your own existence. Allah knows each and one of us personally, nearer to us than our jugular veins. A wealth of sand on the beach is easy to strike of as one big entity but in truth, each of them are unique on its own: this trait only seen by those with wisdom. If there is nothing that opposes the rule of Allah, then you need not worry. Muhasabah is a necessity but please don't leave out justice.

I pity the durian that was so misplaced and unappreciated. Maybe time for a change of scene and circumstances?

Sekilas kata, terbunuh jiwa

Lewat petang. Kepala dah rasa berat, barangkali protes kerana begitu diperah sepanjang hari. Tapi hati senang, malah bernyanyi-nyanyi mengenangkan perjalanan pulang kekampung kali ini akan menyambut hari jadi emak. Pasti riuh dengan berkumpulnya semua adik beradik dan anak saudara..
Hati tak sabar, semua barang telah dikemas. Resah melihat jam, "2 minit lagi pukul 6. Alah, boleh lahhh, " getusku dalam hati lantas mengambil semua barang dan mula menyapa semua dipejabat, "Selamat tinggal! Selamat bercuti semua!!"
Tiba-tiba bos keluar dari bilik. Hairan barangkali. Aku lazimnya tidak seceria itu.
Tiba-tiba ada suara, lantang juga. "Haha, bos mesti terfikir kenapa nak balik awal, bukan ada laki punnnn."
Terpana juga aku, perlahan membalas, "Tapi aku masih ada famili.."
Lalu teruskan saja langkah, enggan terperangkap lagi dalam situasi sebegitu.
Hati masih ringan, tapi persoalan berlegar-legar dalam fikiran, "kenapa dia begitu?"
Fikiranku berkeputusan yang dia begitu kejam. Namun racunnya tak sampai ke hati, kerana niatnya tak dapat kufahami.
******
Haih..
Orang-orang yang mendapat rezeki kadangkala terlalu terbuai dan menjadi angkuh..seolah-olah Tuhan lebih memilihnya dari yang lain.
Sungguh menghairankan...

Lampias keinginan

Sudah resmi burung,
Dilihatnya langit,
Mahu dicapainya,
Mahu dipeluk lembut awannya,
Mahu dibelai sepoi anginnya..

Namun takdirnya dia burung yang tak dapat terbang,
Sayapnya belum diberi kekuatan,
Belum diizin Tuhan menyelusuri alam,
Menggapai isi kayangan.

Atau mungkin takdirnya hanya menyokong teman,
Yang jauh terbang didada langit,
Menyorak, menghargai, mendoakan
Agar yang lain itu baik-baik saja disana
Walau makna doanya yang dibisiknya itupun
Hakikatnya dia belum mengerti
Kerana belum mengalami.

Memaksa hati memahami
Adalah ujiannya sekian lama.
Mengikis kesabaran yang sedikit,
Lalu dipalit kebosanan demi kebosanan.

Mahu dijeritnya saja,
"Pergi kau jauh!
Kenapa terbang disini?
Apa yang kau dapat dengan mengagahku terbang?"

Tapi temannya jauh dilangit,
Tak tercapai suaranya ke mereka,
Malah,
Kata-kata itu tak pernah lepas dari kerongkong,
Luahan perasaan itu cuma senyuman sekilas,
Yang datang dengan hirisan halus dilubuk hati.

Tertunduk saja akhirnya,
Memikirkan mungkin namanya perlu diganti,
Kerana dia
Bukan seperti yang lain.